Fighting for custody of your children is one of the most stressful things a parent can go through. Not being there for your children as they grow and missing significant events like graduation, birthdays, and holidays keep you up at night. Your work and other relationships suffer, and you most likely become angry about everything that is going on.
Many parents lash out during this time, but this comes to harm their custody case later. The Thousand Oaks custody lawyers at the Law Offices of Ronald K. Stitch want to give you our top recommendations for having the best chance to have custody of your children when you are facing divorce.
Understand the Court’s Perspective
The court only has one priority in mind regarding your custody case: the child’s welfare. The court (the judge) will take many aspects of the child’s well-being when deciding what kind of custody arrangement will be made.
Here are some of the considerations (but not limited to) when the court makes its assessment and the strategies you should consider immediately.
Each parent’s willingness and ability to respect and appreciate the bond between the child and the other parent allow for a continuing relationship between the child and the other parent.
One of the worst mistakes a parent makes is putting down the other parent in the child’s presence. This behavior is frowned upon by the court because it creates an alienation of affection. The child does not feel they should love one of their parents because of how they feel and make it known. Do not insult, criticize, or “let off steam” in front of your child, no matter how cantankerous the relationship is. Your child should experience no conflict about loving both parents, no matter how negligent the parent has been.
The child’s adjustment to his or her home, community, and school
Your child should not be missing any school as a result of this divorce. Ensuring your child is connected in the community, involved, and having friends helps prevent a child from being relocated. Make sure and keep accurate records of your child’s absences along with doctor’s notes.
The child’s length of time has been under the actual care and control of any person other than a parent and the circumstances relevant
If your job forces you to travel and leave your child in the care of other people, you will need to make immediate changes to your career so you can stay home and be with your child every day. The court will not tolerate a neighbor, babysitter, nanny, or even a relative watching your child for the majority of your requested custody. The court is looking for stability, and you will need to show that you can offer that all of the time, not merely a couple of days a week.
Negative Conversations as a Form of Evidence
Any negative conversations you have with your ex-spouse can be considered evidence. This includes text messaging and can be looked at by the court. Make sure any text you send is cordial and polite, no matter how heated you are. This includes any voicemails or emails. Many custody battles have been lost because of abusive or threatening language.
At the Law Offices of Ronald K. Stitch, we want to help you get the best custody outcome for you and your children. Please contact us for a free consultation of your case by clicking here or calling us at 818-237-4574.